Sean,

 SD> Haven't used my nuts in years; they were dehydrated years ago by two
 SD> marriages.

   In 1980, I caught the chicken pox from my brother, who caught it from his 
 first wife's kids. His case was mild, but mine was so severe, that it put 
 me into the hospital for a week, and out of work at Burger King, and out 
 of college at the University Of Arkansas At Little Rock (UALR) for two
 months!!
 
   Top to bottom, front to back, not one part of my body was unscathed from
 all the pox...it was like someone had stripped me nude, and put me in a
 vat of itching powder (even my genitals and buttocks were covered)...I was
 in agony, and it nearly went into encephalitis!! They put me in isolation,
 and I had to take the nasty oatmeal baths...I swore I wouldn't eat that
 ever again...but did so, after all my teeth were removed 20 years later (I
 have worn full dentures ever since, so I have my own pair of "Falsies"<G>.
 
   Then, I worked in silkscreen printing for nearly 20 years, absorbing large
 amounts of the nasty solvent methyl-ethyl-ketone (MEK). So, as Janice (my
 late wife) so eloquently put it, "they wouldn't spay me, so he volunteered
 to get neutered". <G> I had to sleep with a bag of frozen peas in the groin
 area for days (she said "you'll never look at them the same way again"...
 and one night, when I said to her "My head is so far up my butt, that I can
 see my throat"...without missing a beat, she said "No wonder your eyes are
 brown!!". <G>
  
   I now have the shingles virus inside of me, which is very painful and
 disfiguring, if you get it. Well, I heard this joke on it, which is funny
 (another ham radio operator had come down with shingles, but said "this is
 funny".
 
   This guy walks into an urgent care clinic, and says he needs to see the
 doctor. The nurse asks him why, and he replied "I've got the shingles".
  
   Well, there was no 3 hour wait in the waiting room, and no 1 hour wait
 in the exam room!! They rushed him back, and the doctor was in there in
 record time!! The exchange went like this:
 
 Doc: "What's the problem?".
 Man: "I've got the shingles".
 Doc: "How long have you had them?".
 Man: "This morning".
 
   The doc looks him over, and says "I don't see anything". The man says
 "I'm the roofing guy...they're in the truck outside. Where do you want
 them??". <G>
 
   Then, there's the Redneck Covid-19 test. You get your favorite bottle
 of wine (you might want it chilled). Pour some into a glass...then, bring
 it up to your nose, and take a sniff. If you can smell it, take a sip. If
 you can taste it, you're negative. Repeat as many times as needed". <G>

 SD> I think by now I'm just crazy.

   You don't have to be crazy to be a Sysop (or a ham radio operator), but
 it helps. <G>
 
   I've been widowed once, but have basically given up on remarriage.
 
 Daryl
 
... 3 things fail with age. Memory is 1st; forgot the other 2.
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